We’ve discussed many articles about the topic of dealing with a manipulator as we know that they can be among us at any day, any time.
Manipulators are easy to be found by how they make you feel. When you are in touch with your emotional state, you feel that tight-gut feeling that tells you to pay attention to the words and actions of the manipulative person you are dealing with.
- Manipulators put their needs before yours
- Manipulators tell you what you need to do
- Manipulators thrive on drama and high-emotions
- Manipulators want you to feel bad about yourself
Here are some steady comebacks to use for the next time you feel yourself being manipulated.
9 Comebacks for Dealing With A Manipulator
- ‘I Need You To…’
‘I need you to speak to me calmly.’
‘I need you to take care of that yourself.’
‘I need you to stop insulting me and speak with kindness.’
It is a very powerful rejection of their tactics when you say something with starting ‘I need’ to a manipulator. You are simultaneously saying ‘No’ to anything the manipulator wants and you are replacing it with something that you like.
‘No’ is a powerful word if you can use it alone. But, ‘No’ is often followed by the reason that you are saying ‘No.’ There is no need of justifying your ‘No’ to a manipulator.
‘What Is Best For Me Right Now Is…’
This is another method to say what you need and reject the manipulator. The best way to deal with a manipulator is to concentrate on your own needs. You can reject the manipulator’s need by replacing it with your own needs.
‘I Reject Your Assessment Of My Emotional State.’
A manipulator will always try to tell you about your feelings. Don’t allow them to dictate your emotions. You are the only person who is in control of your emotional response.
The strategy of telling you how you feel is used by a manipulator to make you angry, fear or sad. You can always be positive, happy and joyful, even when you are dealing with a manipulative person.
‘I Am A Valuable Person.’
Manipulators always try to feed on people with low self-esteem. The manipulators also have low-esteem and they like if they can control others by attempting to reduce their self-worth with insults.
If you can stay strong in front of a manipulator by validating your own self-worth, you show them that you cannot be controlled by them.
‘You Need To Calm Your Emotional State Before Me Will Talk With You.’
There’s a good statement, ‘Let’s take some time so that our emotions can cool down before we try to solve this.’ You should control your anger, sadness, and fear when you are dealing with a manipulator.
As in the article, 8 Signs Your Partner is Trying to Control You, someone who acts on drama will start a confrontation with an extreme emotional state. Don’t respond to the manipulator’s attack with an attack, and your manipulator will be deflated by your comeback.
‘Your Behavior Is Unacceptable.’
This is a true statement. If someone is violating your boundaries, you’ll feel manipulated and this kind of behavior is unacceptable. You may remember the previous article that we talked about How to Spot a Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing. Manipulators are like predators feeding on easy prey.
8. ‘You must be feeling pretty low to lash out at me that way. Do you want to talk about your emotions?”
This is the best statement that you can use as a manipulator. This illustrates your recognition of their anger, fear and sadness and the question demonstrates your openness to help them.
Low self-esteem is a usual sign of a narcissistic personality.
9. Say Nothing at All
Manipulators always thrive on drama. If they can make you angry, sad and fear and get you worked, they think that they have won. Stay calm, manage your breath and concentrate on your body. Feel the sensation of tightness in your chest, shoulders, neck, and stomach. Try to relax those muscles while you make eye contact with your manipulator.
This can be very hard for some people. Facing an angry person with calmness is infuriating for the manipulator. They get even more anger. Resist the urge to b with them. Your manipulator will quickly learn that they are can’t change your emotions and they will move on to another target that is easier.